God is writing the story of our lives!

I never really thought that putting down the pencil would be so hard yet so beautiful at the very same time. I knew what I meant when I named my blog, I knew it meant releasing control of my life, just like it says at the top, under the heading, a moment by moment surrender to the One who created it all! Moment by moment, meaning at each moment surrendering to what I believe God wants even if it was not exactly what I want, or what I would do! My favorite verse in the Bible is “Trust in the Lord with ALL of your heart, lean not on your own understanding, but in ALL your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” Surrendering and trusting that even if it doesn’t make sense, it is God and He created the world, so I would rather be in His will, than my own.writing450

Putting my pencil, my story, my future in His hands, trusting ONLY HE can write the best selling story of my life. It’s never a best seller without pain but the beautiful part is a best seller usually always ends up with a heartwarming ending and I am confident that my God, He works ALL things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. I know I LOVE Him more than anything and am called by name, for His purpose.

He will work these things as well for my good and His glory.

God is God, when I sit and really dwell in that; I see how real He is. I see that He is good, I am beyond thankful for His guidance even if it hurts, and it has hurt lately. I am beyond grateful that He came to set the captives free and I am one of them, I am beyond grateful that He has plans to prosper me, not to harm me, to give me hope and a future, that He is Peace, He gives wisdom freely without measure and that He will work things out in us for a purpose, a purpose to share those stories of freedom with others and help set them free from the yoke of bondage. He is a Redeemer, He is a Rock, He is Hope, He is worthy of our trust and He is my Perfect Father, He teaches, He preaches, He loves and He adores.

My heart is strengthened by the pain of the past two events in my life, He is strong in our weakness and it is kind of amazing! I feel this right now, I feel that He is holding me and that I am stronger than I was before, because I KNOW who holds me through it all, I know who knows my heart, I know who knows my pain and I know who tells me that He is proud of me. That is my Father in Heaven. He truly is before ALL things and in Him all things hold together and I am glad He is writing my story, because He writes the best stories.

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The word ‘unforgivenss’ is not in the dictionary

I think that is weird, why wouldn’t it be in the dictionary? When you look up the word unforgivess in the Merriam Webster is says “there is no official word for unforgiveness” which I just found strange, because I think most of us well meaning, loving, lovable, kind people walk around with unforgivness in our heart all the time and it just eats at our  soul without us really even knowing.

I discovered this first when I had unforgivness in my heart since childhood about someone close to me that hurt me (not meaning too) but did and very deeply.  Truly it had affected my life in every way I can think of, from physical illness, to emotional illness, leading me almost to cause harm to myself.

It wasn’t what happened that made me so (for lack of a better term) “ill”, it was the unforgiveness I carried around for the next 25 years that caused the illness of my body and my emotions. It was a lack of understanding that people make mistakes, well meaning, loving people, just make mistakes in life. This person’s intent was not to harm me, this person actually loves me very much, but I couldn’t see that, because the unforgivness had blinded me with bitterness and resentment that I could not see past. The truth is that person, never knew, and still probably doesn’t know how hurt I was, because “it” the situation had nothing to do with me, even though it affected me in ways I can’t even explain on this little blog entry.

Once I understood how Jesus came to earth, to show us the character of God, then to take on the sins (or the mistakes) of the world (the world, meaning me, because I am one of us in this world and so are you) Jesus came to die for me (and you) for my mistakes (and your mistakes) and the mistakes of those who hurt both, me and you!

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Once I let myself see my mistakes, they actually ran through my head like an old time movie playing in the screen of my eyes.  It was horrific, I have to be honest. I think I wanted to throw up, I know tears (and probably snot) where streaming down my face, as I saw all the ways I made mistakes, the ways I accidentally hurt people, they ways I even knowingly hurt people out of my own anger and pain. I suddenly understood the sacrifice that Jesus made by hanging on that cross until His death, He died so I could be forgiven of all my mistakes (past, present and future). The next thing that popped into my head was, Lindsay, Jesus also died for the mistakes of that person who hurt you so deeply. It’s time to forgive them!

It is too long to continue this story, but there is more! The journey of forgiveness in my life has freed ME, I didn’t say THEM, I said ME from such pain, sorrow, guilt and gripping fear. I could write a book on this, because it changed my whole life once I was able to see that Jesus died for me, for my “mistakes” little and BIG, He also died for the mistakes of those who hurt me and once I understood that and forgave those people, my life changed in a dramatic way!

I hope you will think about this, ask God, He will answer, ask Him who you need to forgive! Then even though it doesn’t “feel” fair to forgive for what they did to you, think about what our mistakes did to Jesus! Feelings are not always true, do as God asks and forgive as you have been forgiven. I promise, you will be FREE if you do!

I wrote a blog post a few months ago with some help on the actual process of forgiving see here!

Joy in Suffering! huh?

What is JOY anyway and why would God tell us in the book of James to “Consider it a sheer gift, when tests and challenges come at us from all sides?” [MSG]

The NIV says it like this….  “Consider it PURE JOY whenever you face trails of many kinds”

I have written a lot in the recent weeks about things such as worry, wonder, trust, staying in the moment, you name it I have been dealing with it and writing about it!  Then I went to a retreat this past weekend with a dear friend of mine in ministry Sarah Ott, a very anointed teacher of God’s divinely penned Word! She is the kind of Bible teacher that after the first time I heard her, I wanted to go home, stay up all night and read the Bible, because I wanted to know what she knew, I wanted to know WHO she knew that gave her such peace and confidence in this life. A life that is often unpredictable and sometimes very painful! This, my friends, is a sign of a teacher appointed by God Himself!

I signed up for this retreat 3 months ago, at that time life had its questions, but nothing too overwhelming that I couldn’t “figure out” or work through with a little prayer, a little counseling and some encouragement from friends!

In the past 3 weeks, I have come upon a different time in my life, when honestly some of my biggest fears in life came to stare me right in the face.

All of this would have been completely paralyzing to me if God Himself had not brought me to a place of TRUST and PEACE in HIM….  It is Him in me, not me… I couldn’t do it myself; I could not face all of this myself….. Which brings me to what I learned this past weekend.

Suffering comes in all kinds of packages, nothing is too small.  As Sarah said, a paper cut is a paper cut when it is not your finger, but when it is your finger, it hurts. At the same time nothing is too big for our God to handle, either! We should not compare our sufferings (or our blessings for that matter), we simply must endure our trials with the confidence that God is in control, not matter what.

Joy does not consider circumstance, it is not something to be mustered up, it is actually someone who dwells within us, who rises up within us (if in fact you have asked Jesus into your life, if you believe He came to set you free from your sins) then Jesus himself, in the form of a spirit, the Holy Spirit lives inside of you! And Jesus Himself is the source of Joy even in our suffering.

What I learned was Joy is to not worry, not to try to figure it out; we are not ultimately in control. Joy looks above and not ahead, Joy is a deep seated assurance that He is in control and admission you are not!

Sarah talked about when you are enveloped by a trial, pain, to first, give joy an opportunity, see it as an option, as a choice, not a feeling such as happiness, which comes and goes with good and bad circumstances, but to consider, joy, which is a confidence that God is sovereign and able to work ALL things for good!

Joy is not denial of fact, or pain, or suffering, it’s not putting your head in the sand and pretending what is going on is not going on, Joy admits the circumstances but sees Jesus in and through it.

Consider Joy, is considering Jesus (Hebrews 12:3), considering He to be present in your circumstance, knowing it is impossible to consider Joy in many painful, gut wrenching circumstances but instead to know that we can rest in Him and He will do it, do Joy, be Joy in us…. if it looks painful it may be painful to walk through but consider Him to be present, to walk with you, as it says in Hebrews “fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, Who [Jesus] for the joy set before Him endured the cross!” the cross was painful, very painful I imagine, but He walked through it, He endured it because it was the will of the Father (Father God) and it was for us. So we would not have to go through anything alone, but we would have the Holy God of the universe, with us through it all.

There is so much more that was revealed this past weekend, so I will write a Part 2 of Consider it Joy soon!

For more information on Establish Her ministry, born out of the scripture 1 Peter 5:10 that says “after you have suffered a little while, the God of ALL grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strength and establish you!”

Email info@establishher.org with your name and email! We welcome you!